I was dreaming you were my Johnny Cash

By Helena Natanael - Thursday, March 01, 2012

Have you feel deeply loved by someone and in love with someone, but suddenly they leave you and never come back?

That's what I feel, every 1st March.

This date, is the birthday of the most wonderful boy I ever met. He's my first crush, when I was in junior high. I hope my relationship with him will lasts forever, 'till we both become an old couple, watching our grandchild running around.. Sitting together in a rocking chair.. on a small comfortable house countryside.. Passing the rest of our life together..

Until that day come.. 13th November 2009.

The day he passed away, after he struggle to beat his sickness for 17 years. Yes, since he was a little baby, he must to face his sickness by himself.

~ ~

He is not a desperate person. He always fight for what he deserves, especially the life he has dreamed every night before he fall asleep. Maybe, the reason why he passed away in his young age, isn't because he already give up to fight.. But because Our Creator's love for him.. God wants to give him a life he deserves, not in earth, but in another life.

At first I can't accept this and can't let him go. I don't understand this... However as the time goes by, I realize this is the best way to make him happy, at least in another life. Yah, God's most unfair way for us actually the fairest path to walk through..

 Katy's The One that Got Away music video perfectly describes my feeling to him. I think you all have watched the original video, so in this post I give you the acoustic version of this song :)

Wishing you all the goods and loves, fellas!

P.S: Alvano, you have secured an eternal place in my heart. I will always love you.

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Your responses brighten my day, thank you ♥

  1. I feel so sorry for you :(

    Very touching post.


  2. I can't imagine what you felt and you're feeling, but your words deeply moved me. I think that, afterall, you've been lucky: you've found you're love. This is what's important! And if you believe in another life, your love is just at the beginning :)

  3. I can't imagine how you're feeling! But things always happen for a reason.
    I hope you find a meaning on what happened, that make you feel happy on this day :)

    Take care, and all the best to you :)


    "Dicas de saúde, beleza, e exercício físico em casa"

  4. I feel very sorry!
    Trust me. God always give us the best way. maybe, it was the best way for him, dear.


  5. My condolences, dear
    I'm sure you'll both see each other in heaven :)

    The Sweetest Escape 

  6. a very big condolences dear o:)

  7. be patient, baby! i know he will be stay in peace there <3 yeah don't be sad, maybe God has another great thing for you be strong!

  8. I am so sorry you lost someoney you really loved :( Have a wonderful life, because I'm sure that's what would make him happy, honey :* kisses and hugs.

  9. I feel really sorry for you, please be happy and always look up to the blue sky and remember one beautiful thing you're alive, and hopefully healthy, you can always make a difference :) Wish you a wonderful weekend dear! ♥XOXO

  10. such a tender story...losing someone you care for can really make you stronger...

    a kiss from the newest followers

  11. Helena,

    I am so sorry you are feeling so sad and are in so much pain. I experienced loss recently and it is so very difficult and sadly there is no instant cure for the sadness. I really hope you're doing alright and hope to hear from you soon. be well!



  12. I am so sorry for your loss :/
    It doesn't matter how much time passes after we lose someone, that emptiness will always be there. But yes, think of it as God taking your boy to a better place. One where he isn't suffering.
    Praying for you girly!


  13. I am so touched, and sorry to hear that. I love Katy Perry's song too. Hope you can put a smile and face the rest of the day. Tetep semangat yaaa, jgn lupa doain dia juga :)

    Karina Dinda R. ♥

  14. gorgeous blog sista
    i like your lovely post! <3

    follow each other?
    sure, i'm following you now
    follow me back

    Dream Big!

  15. Beautiful blog!
    Would you like to follow each other?
    Fashionhypnotised girl

  16. This comment has been removed by the author.

  17. OMG T___T
    I feel so emo after reading your post.
    yes, I also believe God loves him so he prepares another awesome life for him in there.
    As for you, cheer up. There's this cliche (but still so true) quote:
    "Don't cry because it is over, but smile cause it happened"


  18. Thanks for stopping by at my blog. I am your 130th follower now ;)

  19. Thx for comment and backfollowing on gfc, of course we can follow on bloglovin too. I already followed you on bloglovin:)


  20. such a beautiful song and beautifully written, h! :) hope you are well, and i would be honored if you entered my giveaway if you have time. :)
    have a nice day!

  21. Sensitive post! Beautiful..


  22. Follow you right now sweetie! Hope you follow back!
    Fashionhypnotised girl

  23. Stay strong babe, everything happens for a reason.. maybe this is the best for him.. I gave you an award, check it out!

  24. Such a lovely, emotional, moving post dear. I'm so sorry for your lost. But in a way you also had found love, some People are spending a lifetime looking for one. Hold on to that love and live your life to the fullest!



  25. I am so sorry to hear that the young man in your life passed away... The one that got away is my favorite song from Katy and that video is probably one of the best videos I've ever seen. The make-up they did on her to make her into an older lady was unbelievable. Many people spend their entire life looking for the one...so all the best on your search.


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