By Helena Natanael - Wednesday, December 24, 2014

There's only one happiness in life: to love and to be loved in return.

Dear the shy boy that secretly has the heart of gold, 

You are the one that catch my eyes recently. First time I met you, I didn't expect to fall in love with you, at all. But I have to admit that I get interested quickly with smart guys. And that leads from just a "wow, he's so damn smart" to sparkles in my eyes every time you are around.

Sometimes I wonder why my heart chooses you. Feelings work in mysterious yet illogical ways, those things that my brain can't take, are the same things that my heart insists to have.

Dear my love, please be in love with someone else better than me. It would break my heart into pieces, but it'd also give me courage to move on. Because as long as we are still close, my heart would always want you and my brain can't stop it, my brain can't stop that ridiculous thing called love. My heart would still skip a beat every time I see your smile. My knees would still turn into jelly every time I hear your deep and manly voice. My body would still feel safe near your strong arms. My lips would still smile when I see your stupid random acts. Those feelings are beautiful, but I'm enough with this, I can clearly see how this one ends.

I'm thankful to have you turning my world upside down and bring my heart in a roller-coaster. I wish I could fall in love with someone else, to heal my wounded heart just like you heal me once. But until that time, let's create good memories of us, so when it comes to wave goodbye, we are wearing smile in our lips and don't let the tears out of our eyes.

Heyyaaaaa readers!

Finally, a chance to write again. It has been months since my last post. I'm not going to blame my university's class schedule, because actually it's not hectic. But what I've learned these past 3 months, university life is all about learning inside and outside the class. Lecturer only gives 30%-40% of the material, and to get optimal score (and understanding), you have to make time to learn by yourself, outside the class. It doesn't always have to be at home, it can be at mall with your friends, lol #truestory. That's why I'm not blaming my schedule, because for ordinary students, they'll have enough spare time to do things such as blogging or shopping or hang out with friends. However I'm not going to be an ordinary student, and remembering the fact that I'm a newbie of programming (yes I'm already familiar with PHP and HTML, but this C language is in a totally different state of programming!), I have to learn a lot. And my spare time was spent learning by myself, reading reference sources, and also "terrorizing" the smart one for better understanding, hahaha. Hopefully good GPA is the outcome of these struggles.*crossing finger*

 BINUS Clothing Tees, Mom's Skirt, Something Borrowed bracelet,  
ROMWE bag, Atypical Shoes.

For the outfit, I was so inspired by Taylor Swift's new album,1989. Thank God, I found a lovely vintage skirt in my mom's box of unwanted clothes. I bet that skirt was from 1980's era. Combined with a personalized tees that I ordered at BINUS Clothing, I feel like going back to the past. Heal, in the tee's front, is the acronym of my full name, Helena Natanael, lol. I also love the idea of printing wings on my tee's back, feels like an angel hahaha. Very satisfied with BINUS Clothing's service :)

By the way, the new year is just around the corner. I'm not kind of "making-resolution" person in every end of year, every year I aim for the same target: be the best version of  myself :) but I admit that every year, the steps of realizing that target is quite different, it depends on the circumstances, hahaha. I wish you all a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2015! Happy Holidays!

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